Fewer shibboleths = less elegance.

I have to get something off my chest:

Why do people find it so hard to use the comparative adjectives 'less' and 'fewer' correctly? Whilst I am trying very hard to be progressive about the evolution of English, certain things are just wrong, and grate on my nerves, and this case is one of them.

Look, it's really easy to use these adjectives properly, and here's how:

When it comes to comparing quantity, nouns in English come in two forms:

• Mass nouns
• Count nouns

Mass Nouns.

A mass noun is something that cannot be counted in individual units. Examples are 'air', 'sand' and 'snow.' The simplest test of whether something is a mass noun or not is, 'Can I pluralise it?' If you can, it is not a mass noun. For example, you cannot say, "There are five airs in the bell jar"; nor can you say, "I brought three sands home from the beach." Mass nouns must be used with a unit in these cases: "There are five litres of air in the bell jar," and "I brought three buckets of sand home from the beach."

When comparing mass nouns, you use the word 'less', as in, "There is less air in this jar than there is in the room." "There is less sand in this bucket than there is on the beach."

For the purposes of counting and comparison, abstract nouns behave as mass nouns, as in, "There is less truancy in District A than there is in District B."

Mass nouns and abstract nouns are always singular. If you find yourself using 'are less', you have gone wrong somewhere.

Count Nouns.

A count noun is something that can be counted in individual units. Examples are 'idiot', 'jelly bean' and 'car.' If you can pluralise a noun, it is a count noun. "There are two idiots making noise outside." "There are three jelly beans down the back of the settee."

When comparing count nouns, you use the word 'fewer', as in, "There are fewer idiots outside tonight than there were last night." "There are fewer jelly beans down the back of the settee than there are in the jar."

Note that the count nouns themselves are ALWAYS pluralised, when comparing them with 'fewer.'

It's this simple:

• Mass Nouns = ' is less'
• Count Nouns = ' are fewer'